Good night Jesus,
Thank you again, for rescuing me for the thousand times in my life. I’m sorry for being so arrogant, thinking that I can solve this my way, that i don’t need you, that it’s okay to not needing you.
Not it’s never been okay.
You are the only source I could live with, without you, I am dying.
You are my living battery, my energy source, my pure water, my fresh air, and If i chose anything else but you, i would die. Because I only could live breathing you, consuming you, living in you. I would die, hurting, aching, drowning if i ever leave you.
You are the only source. Nothing else.
Thank you Jesus, for always being there, and never let me down, I know that I would always be disappointed if i put my expectations on people. I know that there’s no other source but you. Without you I can do nothing. There, I said it. There’s no better explanation for it.
To fail sometimes. Because it’s not flesh and bodies you’re fighting to. It’s darkness, it’s bad spirit. Consuming you and drowning you down. Sometimes you’re off guard, but one thing you have to remember is to, DON’T EVER IGNORE JESUS.
He knows that you may took a lot of bad decisions recently. He knows that you didn’t mean it at the first place. He knows that you have good intention, you are a good person. He knows that you don’t want to disappoint Him. He knows that you love Him so much. Failing the trials doesn’t mean that you didn’t love him, or you didn’t want to listen to him. It just simply means that you’re a human, sometimes you failed the trials, and he understands.
So please, please, please,
Come to Jesus. In any situation you are, right now.
No matter how dirty you are, how bad you are, how stupid you are, or even how disappointing you are to Jesus, he will be more disappointed if you turn you head away from him after all you’ve done.
It’s okay. He’s forgiven you. He sees everything. He understands why you did what you did, better than anyone else. Even better than yourself. It’s okay. He’s glad that you’re back. You’ve been lost, but you’ve come home now. You are more than welcome, he will throw a party for you. He understands everything, he’s your most understanding father.
You could hug him.
You can hug even hug him till he couldn’t breath just because you know how relieving it is to know that you’re always safe in His arm. To know that he will always giving you the best advice. To know that he will always accept you in whatever condition you are now. To know that he’s the one who will never disappoint you. To know that he’s the one who see the REAL you and still accept and love you no matter what. That he’s the one who’s seen everything about you, and don’t have any bad intention or taking advantages of you.
He’s the one.
Please remember that. Please. You should come back to Jesus :”)
Please. don’t fight this alone, okay? You know who you’re fighting right? :”)
He loves you so much. He’s the one who deserves my purest love. My true love. My trust. My everything. He’s the true place to put my anxiety, my tiring day, my impossible problems, my hurting heart, my disappointing life, my everything.
I love you Jesus. I know that I would never love anyone bigger than this.
Thank you, for BEING THERE. To be exist at the first place. Because, i don’t know what i would do without you. Nothing? Yes, nothing. Nothing I could do without you.
Thank you, at last. You know how much I love you right? :”)